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A little Friday humour, OR any day you want to share a laugh
henrietta
post Posted: Feb 17 2015, 06:21 PM
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Profound statement from elsewhere.

QUOTE
Who cares about profit being in the red?


Cheers
J

 
chukk
post Posted: Feb 16 2015, 10:35 AM
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In Reply To: surfer's post @ Feb 16 2015, 09:01 AM

Thanks Surfer. Incredible stuff. Amazing how so many of the pedestrians appear to have a death wish, just walking out in front of the traffic.

When I clicked on the link it didn't work, but a cut and paste got me there.

Regards


 
balance
post Posted: Feb 16 2015, 09:10 AM
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In Reply To: surfer's post @ Feb 16 2015, 09:01 AM

Russian dash cams are an endless mix of mirth, incredulity, terror and liberal amounts of WTF.

Dashcams of course caught the Chelyabinsk meteor and Transasia air crash.



--------------------
Day Trader: Lowest form of life in the known universe.
Shorter: Can limbo under a day trader.
Investor: Salt of the Earth.Sits to the right of God (Warren Buffet)
Share prices are only ever manipulated down.
Paper losses are not really losses.
Chat site posters always know better & know more than anyone about anything.
I'm 29.
The cheque is in the mail.
 
surfer
post Posted: Feb 16 2015, 09:01 AM
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IN RUSSIA YOU CAN NOT GET CAR INSURANCE UNLESS YOU HAVE A DASH CAM THIS IS BECAUSE THE PLACE IS SO CORRUPT AND WITH THE RIGHT AMOUNT OF INFLUENCE AND MONEY YOU CAN CHANGE ANYONE'S STORY - HOLD ON TO YOUR SEATS .... FOR THE RIDE OF YOUR LIFE !!

This is why Russians use dashboard cameras-

http://www.youtube.com/embed/5RAaW_1FzYg?autoplay=1&modestbranding=1&rel=0&s




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arty
post Posted: Feb 13 2015, 10:02 PM
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Attached File  Zimbabwe.jpg ( 38.42K ) Number of downloads: 7




--------------------
I trade daily, but I am not a licensed adviser. Whether you find my ideas reasonable or not: The only person responsible for your actions is YOU.
I follow two rules: (1) There are no sacred truths. All assumptions must be critically examined. Arguments from authority are worthless. (2) Whatever is inconsistent with observed facts must be discarded or revised. We must understand the Market as it is and not confuse how it is with how we wish it to be. (inspired by Carl Sagan)

Said 'Thanks' for this post: balance  bananabender  grevillia  nipper  
 
lgrif
post Posted: Feb 6 2015, 03:33 PM
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A little boy was sitting on the footpath with a bottle of turpentine. He was shaking it and watching the bubbles.
A passing Priest asked the little boy what he had.
Boy; A bottle of turpentine, it's the most powerful liquid in then world.
Priest; Your wrong son. The most powerful liquid in the world is Holy Water; If you rub it on a pregnant woman's tummy she'll pass a fine , healthy baby.
Boy; I rubbed turpentine on our cat's bum and he passed a Harley Davidson.


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arty
post Posted: Feb 2 2015, 10:57 AM
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Deeply profound thoughts by two men:

Two men are out just fishing quietly and drinking beer.


Attached File  Fishn.jpg ( 22.72K ) Number of downloads: 0


Almost silently, so as not to scare the fish, Bob says, 'I think I'm gonna divorce my wife. She hasn't spoken to me in over 2 months.'

Rod continues slowly sipping his beer then thoughtfully says, 'You better think it over, Bob. Women like that are hard to find.'



--------------------
I trade daily, but I am not a licensed adviser. Whether you find my ideas reasonable or not: The only person responsible for your actions is YOU.
I follow two rules: (1) There are no sacred truths. All assumptions must be critically examined. Arguments from authority are worthless. (2) Whatever is inconsistent with observed facts must be discarded or revised. We must understand the Market as it is and not confuse how it is with how we wish it to be. (inspired by Carl Sagan)

Said 'Thanks' for this post: balance  alonso  pacestick  grevillia  
 
arty
post Posted: Feb 2 2015, 10:31 AM
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Several days ago, as I left a meeting, I desperately gave myself a personal search. I was looking for my keys.
They were not in my pockets. A quick search in the meeting room revealed nothing.


Suddenly I realised I must have left them in the car.

Frantically, I headed for the car park.

My husband has scolded me many times for leaving the keys in the ignition.

My theory is the ignition is the best place not to lose them. His theory is that the car will be stolen.

As I scanned the car park I came to a terrifying conclusion! His theory was right. The car park was empty.

I immediately called the police. I gave them my location, confessed that I had left my keys in the car, and that it had been stolen.

Then I made the most difficult call of all.
"Hello my love", I stammered. (I always call him "my love" in times like these)


"I left my keys in the car, and it has been stolen."

There was a period of silence. I thought the call had disconnected, but then I heard his voice.


He barked, "I dropped you off!"

Now it was my time to be silent. Embarrassed, I said, "Well, come and get me."

He retorted, "I will, as soon as I convince this policeman I have not stolen your bloody car."

This is what they call " the Golden Years" ......




--------------------
I trade daily, but I am not a licensed adviser. Whether you find my ideas reasonable or not: The only person responsible for your actions is YOU.
I follow two rules: (1) There are no sacred truths. All assumptions must be critically examined. Arguments from authority are worthless. (2) Whatever is inconsistent with observed facts must be discarded or revised. We must understand the Market as it is and not confuse how it is with how we wish it to be. (inspired by Carl Sagan)

Said 'Thanks' for this post: grevillia  
 
surfer
post Posted: Feb 1 2015, 11:09 AM
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Irish Sawmill Accident

Paddy and Mick are two Irishmen working at the local sawmill.

One day, Mick slips and his arm gets caught and severed by the big bench
saw. Paddy quickly puts the limb in a plastic bag and rushes it and Mick to
the local hospital.

Next day, Paddy goes to the hospital and asks after Mick. The nurse says,
"Oh he's out in Rehab exercising".

Paddy couldn't believe it, but there's Mick out the back exercising his now
re-attached arm. The very next day he's back at work in the saw mill.

A couple of days go by, and then Mick slips and severs his leg on another
bloody big saw.

So Paddy puts the limb in a plastic bag and rushes it and Mick off to
Hospital..

Next day he calls in to see him and asks the nurse how he is.. The nurse
replies, "He's out in the Rehab again exercising".

And sure enough, there's Mick out there doing some serious work on the
treadmill. And very soon Mick comes back to work.

But, as usual, within a couple of days he has another accident and severs
his head.

Wearily Paddy puts the head in a plastic bag and transports it and Mick to
hospital.

Next day he goes in and asks the nurse how Mick is. The nurse breaks down
and cries and says, "He's dead."

Paddy is shocked, but not surprised. "I suppose the saw finally did him in."

"No", says the nurse, "Some dopey bastard put his head in a plastic bag and
he suffocated.


Said 'Thanks' for this post: alonso  
 
surfer
post Posted: Jan 30 2015, 08:19 AM
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Thoughts for today,




Last year I joined a support group for procrastinators. We haven't met yet!



The day the world runs out of wine is just too terrible to think about!



I don't trip over things, I do random gravity checks!



I don't need anger management. I need people to stop pissing me off!



Old age is coming at a really bad time!



When I was a child I thought Nap Time was a punishment ... now, as a grown up, it just feels like a small vacation!



The biggest lie I tell myself is ... "I don't need to write that down, I'll remember it."



Lord grant me the strength to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can & the friends to post my bail when I finally snap!



I don't have gray hair. I have "wisdom highlights". I'm just very wise.



My people skills are just fine. It's my tolerance to idiots that needs work.



If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would've put them on my knees.



The kids text me "plz" which is shorter than please. I text back "no" which is shorter than "yes".



I like my middle finger best because it always sticks up for me!



I'm going to retire and live off of my savings. Not sure what I'll do that second week.



I've lost my mind and I'm pretty sure my kids took it!



Even duct tape can't fix stupid ... but it can muffle the sound!



Why do I have to press one for English when you're just gonna transfer me to someone I can't understand anyway?





Of course I talk to myself, sometimes I need expert advice.



Oops! Did I roll my eyes out loud?



At my age "Getting lucky" means walking into a room and remembering what I came in there for





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